怠, slothfulness

Do you remember last time I put the blog page title a baby sloth. Isn’t that cute? Yes it is a wonderful thing. Slothfulness is even worse than sex problems, sex when you use it rightfully in a marriage it is a wonderful thing. But slothfulness is totally a taboo. You cannot risk it, even now people having idea of Lethargiosis but simply I don’t think it is an excuse to it, I mean what good to sloth? Just like what Wendy Wasserstein said, work less not workless. If you do not do it, what are the consequences? E.g. if you do not work, you have no money…

I learn that the causation of slothfulness recently, it may cause by Discouragement, Perfectionism, and Past Disappointments.[a] Yes it is very true. For my case it really can fit into the example of slothfulness. Thank God I realize this sin early or if I let it corrupts me on and on, I don’t think that I can survive out there. Discouragement,

“Disheartened people can seem slothful. Perhaps their parents told them they were worthless, stupid, or would never amount to anything. Or they are disabled and feel their options are limited. Or they’ve tried again and again, but can’t seem to achieve their goal.” (intouch org.)

I had been disheartened because I lost motivation and have not encouraged by my parents for past decades, now they are better but it is ineffective anymore. In Galatians 6:7-8 say it right. I gave up and go slothful way.

Second, perfectionism, yes, I do admit I am perfectionist. Well friends warn me about that, but it is still a part of my personality, need time to revert it. You know how much it will cost don’t you? The cost of reverting. Yeah, Exodus 4:10-16. I did what Moses did exactly, putting my responsibility to others while I fear of doing it. I feared that I can’t do thing better at my high expectations, so eventually hindered me from doing what is good. You know what, I don’t start a game from level one, I straight go to the final stage, and I lose the game and say the game is impossible to win. What am I expecting? Beating the boss without previous experience and efforts? Games can cheat to win, but in reality, cheating may works but the consequences, I couldn’t bear it.

Third, Past Disappointment. I disappointed in a lot of things because I expect things to be perfect, and it weren’t meeting my expectations. I blame people, blaming God, and curse myself. Blaming God that he gives me such a hard way to walk through. Yeah, I realized he wanted me to learn. Pain = lesson, it is right when you say no pain no gain right?

Yes slothfulness is a deadly sin. It break relationships, it makes you suffer hunger when your resources ran out, and lead to other deadly sins as well. I hope God has mercy on me, lead me not into the sin but deliver me out, and learn from it. I think this time He is using me to witness the sin of slothfulness among us. I wanted to change. I prayed that I may have wisdom to become wise enough to handle things over. Thank you for listening to my cries last night. Thanks. Love ya.