"There is always a war cry in my heart, my heart is flaming as my eyes gaze on you Lord. Thank you for the past whole month I rest in your peace and happiness."
The whole week has gone by and I know I am still in the midst of the enemy's attacking range. What I meant is the spiritual warfare... I never had rested like before after the string of events during the June intake program. I know I am tired, I know I started to worn out, but I know I serving the Lord. In 2 Corinthians 4:16 helps me a lot when in the moment of feeling worn off. It says: "Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day."The counsellor in me always reminds me of whenever I walk the more attack it is, that is the right way to go. God never told us that as we follow Him we will not suffer, instead He had warn us that the world will eventually hate us. The land will curse us as the nation will rise against us. I don't think they understand why they are hating us too, just angered and rages because saw their own flaws and imperfections.
When the light is shining in the dark, all things revealed, shameful things, hidden sin, unforgiveness and hatred. When the salt of healing touches these wounds, he rages because of denial. Denial of the brokenness. What I learn is that we needed to accept our brokenness only can be heal, if you fear the initial pain of healing how much more will you bear from the pain that damages your soul? In 2 Corinthians 2:14-15 says: "Now thanks be to God who always leads us in triumph in Christ, and through us diffuses the fragrance of His knowledge in every place. For we are to God the fragrance of Christ among those who are being saved and among those who are perishing." I recalled that last time in Jewish culture in the history, a woman can earn a bottle of ointment from a year's salary until then this bottle is broken and pour on the body during marriage. The bottle is beautiful and also is very expansive, many people will think like this. But in order for the fragrance to release, the bottle must first be broken.
Same to our lives as Christians, we were like this. God had already annointed us the day we believe and accepted Him,(1 John 2:20,27) and most of the time we are unwilling to break the outward man or persona (2 Corinthians 4:16) to let the annointing flows out from us. We first must accept our brokenness only we can be heal. Still there are so many of us clinging on the way we were. Staying in the comfort zones unwilling to face the pain of the brokenness in our hearts.
Let us be real to ourselves... If you feel you are broken then let God heals it, everyone is wounded since birth, but only God can heals it. In order to heals it, you need to let God enter you and then you shall be whole. (Think this to your loneliness feel too, don't solve this loneliness feel by finding a girlfriend or boyfriend - it is worst solution ever!) Loneliness is also a broken part of us.
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